I so miss writing. Since the move, it has been so hard to get back into writing anything. I am usually thinking how I need to get a job, having stupid allergy/sinus issues or just other normal everyday life things. All of this is clogging my brain and things are not coming to me like they used too.
I am hoping I can get back into the swing of things like it was before everything in life started happening at once taking up my time. I am slowly writing a Christmas story. I was hoping I would have it done by Christmas but it looks like it won't be done until after. I have written a few poems, done some photography but haven't published them anywhere but my FB page and after this little blog, I will be post another about something that is in my head. I haven't even watched that many movies to do a review on them.
I just wanted stop by to say hi and why I have stopped posting things. Hope every one is good and Happy Holidays to everyone!
Friday, December 21, 2012
Tuesday, November 20, 2012
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Crazy Thought
Another weird crazy thought in my head.
A crazy game parents play with their kids: pretending to eat them "because they are so yummy." :P How did this come about?
We pretend to be cannibalistic on our kids! For fun! And they enjoy it! I admit, it's fun on both ends but it's a really strange thing to play.
"Can I eat your toes/fingers? But they're so yummy. Nom nom nom" etc etc LOL
The things that seem harmless (and are harmless) until we sit there & think about it. Once we think about it, it's like "what the hell kind of game/song (etc) is this?" then we continue to do it because it provides harmless entertainment to our kids. Life is so amusing. :D
A crazy game parents play with their kids: pretending to eat them "because they are so yummy." :P How did this come about?
We pretend to be cannibalistic on our kids! For fun! And they enjoy it! I admit, it's fun on both ends but it's a really strange thing to play.
"Can I eat your toes/fingers? But they're so yummy. Nom nom nom" etc etc LOL
The things that seem harmless (and are harmless) until we sit there & think about it. Once we think about it, it's like "what the hell kind of game/song (etc) is this?" then we continue to do it because it provides harmless entertainment to our kids. Life is so amusing. :D
Saturday, September 29, 2012
Saying Goodbye To Part Of A Life
I was going to stay off the blogs until I moved but something came to mind which means I must write about it. :P
Saying goodbye to a place of 10 yrs. 10 yrs of memories. Of the good & the bad. It went by pretty fast. So fast it's scary. It's funny how one can be so ready to leave & yet sad. 10 yrs is a lot of stuff. A lot of feelings. Exploring the neighborhood, getting our first family dog, loosing our first family dog, getting another cat & loosing him who happens to be buried in the backyard. I don't want to leave him but he is probably ashes. Still......
Watching my kids grow up, having my mom out here for the first time, loosing a baby, our financials going up & down and loosing 4 different business all for different reasons. Having both my 10 yr anniversary & my 15th. So many things happened. We never think about these, we just continue to do what we do.
Taking a few mins to take a look back at everything can be mind blowing. It then hits you just how time really does fly. How lives change, how everything changes all in a short amount of time. 10 yrs is not so short of a time but the fact that it goes by so fast, it really is short. It lets you know just how precious life & time really is. This is the first house my husband & I bought together. It's funny how something like a house can mean so much.
So long house. I will cherish the memories. Here is to a new journey. Another 10 + yrs. To building more & different memories.
Watching my kids grow up, having my mom out here for the first time, loosing a baby, our financials going up & down and loosing 4 different business all for different reasons. Having both my 10 yr anniversary & my 15th. So many things happened. We never think about these, we just continue to do what we do.
Taking a few mins to take a look back at everything can be mind blowing. It then hits you just how time really does fly. How lives change, how everything changes all in a short amount of time. 10 yrs is not so short of a time but the fact that it goes by so fast, it really is short. It lets you know just how precious life & time really is. This is the first house my husband & I bought together. It's funny how something like a house can mean so much.
So long house. I will cherish the memories. Here is to a new journey. Another 10 + yrs. To building more & different memories.
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Going to be a bit
It's going to be a little bit before I can get back on here with more blogging. I am in the middle of moving & don't know when I will have things set back up & a little time. Hope to be back on here soon. Take care everyone. :-)
Friday, September 21, 2012
A new chapter
This past month I have been kinda quiet. Things are changing & it's hard to find time & calmness to get my thoughts out. This month we were finally told that we have to leave the house. We have/had a month. We thought we would be able to live where our bankruptcy lawyer used to live but there was miscommunication & it got rented out to someone else. Then we tried a mobile community that we have been looking at for awhile. They didn't accept us because of the bankruptcy. So we have been stuck.
A lot of places won't take us because we just filed & it just closed. We have tried to see if there is a list that we can get for people who have recently went through a bankruptcy & who need a place to live. All we find are people/companies that want money for the list. We keep getting told our situation won't be a problem but then it is. We are very honest & upfront with people when looking for a place. It is very frustrating especially since we have to be out in a couple of weeks. We are running out of time.
We do have enough money to move, have enough to pay a monthly rent. We were just dealt a bad hand that caused us to go into the bankruptcy. We are so ready for the next chapter in our lives. Once we do get settled, my husband will try to get a second job. I will try to find a job. I may even look into getting a street legal scooter to help me get around. It's cheaper than a car & I don't have to have a license if it's under 50 mph. I just have to learn how to drive & pray nothing happens to me when I am driving it. Frankly I am scared of driving because of the bad drivers out there (that is another story).
We may have help from one of my cousins but I don't know how much he will be able to help because of our credit. My God we just need a place that isn't crappy or in a crappy neighbourhood. UGH! There has to be something out there for people like us but where? It's hard to find them when the internet is saturated with scammers. I will just be glad to finally get a place & start new. A new chapter. A new journey.
A lot of places won't take us because we just filed & it just closed. We have tried to see if there is a list that we can get for people who have recently went through a bankruptcy & who need a place to live. All we find are people/companies that want money for the list. We keep getting told our situation won't be a problem but then it is. We are very honest & upfront with people when looking for a place. It is very frustrating especially since we have to be out in a couple of weeks. We are running out of time.
We do have enough money to move, have enough to pay a monthly rent. We were just dealt a bad hand that caused us to go into the bankruptcy. We are so ready for the next chapter in our lives. Once we do get settled, my husband will try to get a second job. I will try to find a job. I may even look into getting a street legal scooter to help me get around. It's cheaper than a car & I don't have to have a license if it's under 50 mph. I just have to learn how to drive & pray nothing happens to me when I am driving it. Frankly I am scared of driving because of the bad drivers out there (that is another story).
We may have help from one of my cousins but I don't know how much he will be able to help because of our credit. My God we just need a place that isn't crappy or in a crappy neighbourhood. UGH! There has to be something out there for people like us but where? It's hard to find them when the internet is saturated with scammers. I will just be glad to finally get a place & start new. A new chapter. A new journey.
Thursday, August 23, 2012
Regrets
Regrets, a lot of us have them and some of us don't. For me, being completely honest here, there is only one thing I truly regret. That is letting my elementary school fuck me over in my last year there (more of that later). Other than that, I wouldn't change anything because it has made me who I am today. With that being said, I think it's still fun to sit here & think about the things I could change if I had the chance. That is what this is about.
One of the things that I would change if I could is my whole entire elementary & high school years. Ok maybe not everything in my high school years but some of it. In elementary school, I would have fought back with words to my bullies, entertained myself on the playground instead of sitting up against the wall feeling invisible. Spoke up more to my teachers, told on the teacher that bullied me with his anger & I wouldn't have allowed my school to toss me away when there was no more room in the 7th grade class room. See when there was no more room in the class, they put me & a few other minorities in the 6th grade to fend for ourselves instead of getting a bigger class room or splitting the one 7th grade into two different class rooms. I went from 6th grade twice to 8th grade.
In high school, I would have tried out for badminton, tried harder to go to the prom, not have let my drama teacher make me feel stupid & I would have done that one skit for my drama class that would have caused me to cry a lot (it made me think of my grandfather that passed). I would have told one of my PE teachers to stick it when she told me that my asthma wouldn't act up during an exercise on the floor & for me to keep going. I also would have complained about her. When a dean threatened to suspend me if I went to him again about someone threatening me, I would have reported him along with the person that threatened me.
Away from school, I would have some how found a way to deal with the bullies at the apartments I lived in, would have tried to turn my friend's mom in for abuse, would have been more vocal to my family about how I was feeling about things instead of being to scared to speak up. I would have made someone listen. The people that have stolen from me pay in some way, report my next door neighbour to Social Services (doing drugs & having 2 young kids), Would have spoken more to a guy that was interested in me & I would have taken more time getting to know my dad's boyfriend turned husband. I would have gotten medicine a lot earlier for my asthma. I wouldn't have said certain things on the Internet or re-worded things.
That is pretty much all that I would change in my fantasy world. When it comes down to it, I really wouldn't change anything. I am me for a reason. I may be having some struggles with certain things but I am very thankful for what I do have. Things could be worse. We can always pretend & dream of changing things from the past but that would change everything else including who we are today. All we can do is effect our future by learning & dealing with our past.
One of the things that I would change if I could is my whole entire elementary & high school years. Ok maybe not everything in my high school years but some of it. In elementary school, I would have fought back with words to my bullies, entertained myself on the playground instead of sitting up against the wall feeling invisible. Spoke up more to my teachers, told on the teacher that bullied me with his anger & I wouldn't have allowed my school to toss me away when there was no more room in the 7th grade class room. See when there was no more room in the class, they put me & a few other minorities in the 6th grade to fend for ourselves instead of getting a bigger class room or splitting the one 7th grade into two different class rooms. I went from 6th grade twice to 8th grade.
In high school, I would have tried out for badminton, tried harder to go to the prom, not have let my drama teacher make me feel stupid & I would have done that one skit for my drama class that would have caused me to cry a lot (it made me think of my grandfather that passed). I would have told one of my PE teachers to stick it when she told me that my asthma wouldn't act up during an exercise on the floor & for me to keep going. I also would have complained about her. When a dean threatened to suspend me if I went to him again about someone threatening me, I would have reported him along with the person that threatened me.
Away from school, I would have some how found a way to deal with the bullies at the apartments I lived in, would have tried to turn my friend's mom in for abuse, would have been more vocal to my family about how I was feeling about things instead of being to scared to speak up. I would have made someone listen. The people that have stolen from me pay in some way, report my next door neighbour to Social Services (doing drugs & having 2 young kids), Would have spoken more to a guy that was interested in me & I would have taken more time getting to know my dad's boyfriend turned husband. I would have gotten medicine a lot earlier for my asthma. I wouldn't have said certain things on the Internet or re-worded things.
That is pretty much all that I would change in my fantasy world. When it comes down to it, I really wouldn't change anything. I am me for a reason. I may be having some struggles with certain things but I am very thankful for what I do have. Things could be worse. We can always pretend & dream of changing things from the past but that would change everything else including who we are today. All we can do is effect our future by learning & dealing with our past.
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